Friday, January 16, 2009

For all intensive purposes

I've always believed myself to be an adept communicator. I've never had a problem expressing what I'm feeling or explaining myself or getting a point across. Granted, this may be because there is never a shortage of words when I am communicating (I fear I am becoming one of those people whose trap is never shut), but whatever the case, I feel confident in my ability to have others understand me. Unfortunately, the same is often not true when I am trying to understand what is being communicated to me. Although it may have something to do with my hearing, I fear it mostly has to do with my lack of common sense. These misunderstandings fall into two categories: situations when the person talking to me is being sarcastic or trying to imply something and I totally fail to recognize it, and situations when I do not understand or hear correctly the actual words spoken to me. Thankfully, I know there are others of you out there who are as slow to catch on to sarcasm and implications as I am, but do any of you still have a hard time understanding what words are being spoken? (Here I am touting what a good communicator I am and I have this feeling that none of you know what the heck I'm talking about.)
Let me illustrate. Have you guys all played Mad Gab? It's that game where there are silly phrases written on cards and one team at a time has to keep repeating the phrases until they are able to figure out the real phrases being represented. For example, a card might read Way tame hen hit, and the team has to figure out that the phrase being represented is Wait a minute. Understand?
Well for me, it is like I have been playing this game my entire life, except backwards. It's like someone is saying to me "Wait a minute," and I am like "What? What do you mean, 'Way tame hen hit?'" I'm not kidding! It happens ALL THE TIME, and it is so humiliating. Remember that Hands to Heaven song? (Tonight I need your sweet caress, hold me in the darkness...) Well, despite the fact that I had been listening to and singing that song for most of my life, it had never occurred to me that perhaps the lyrics tonight you call my rest lush nest, you believe my sadness didn't make a lick of sense. It wasn't until Brian and I were dating and we were driving back to his house while this song was on the radio and he sang, tonight you calm my restlessness; you relieve my sadness, that I thought, but of course! And then there was the time in college when I was sitting around the kitchen table with my roommates trying to coordinate something, and I said, "Well, we'll just play it by year." And my roommate asked, "Did you just say 'play it by year'?" And I said, "Yeah." And she said, "It's play it by ear!" Are you kidding me? I had spent like twenty years saying 'play it by year' and nobody had ever enlightened me? So anyway, this is the sort of thing that happens to me all the time.
Well the other day, I was reading Brooke's blog and she was saying, "For all intents and purposes..." and I started chuckling to myself thinking, how fabulous that my Florence best friend has the same disorder I have! She doesn't realize that it is supposed to be for all intensive purposes. Hehehe..he......he....he....Wait a minute! Oh, crap, not again! Later on, Brian confirmed what I had feared--it's not for all intensive purposes. Please forgive me for doubting you, Brooke. I should have known better.
Anyway...

I've never posted this fabulous picture taken at Laura's wedding. It's the picture that Sarah put in the center of the quilt she made me for Christmas. I love it!















And here's a few more just for entertainment and history's sake.


12 comments:

Ryan & Brooke said...

Oh, my heck. I laughed so hard! The throw back your head and laugh and laugh and laugh even though your the only one in the house kind of laugh. It was probably good Ryan wasn't home. Ann, I did just graduate. I would hope some of the little vocabulary knowledge I gained would have stuck with me for at least a month. He Hee.

Rachel McEwen said...

I can't tell you how many times justin corrects me on the things that i say. i think that i have been saying it right (or i wouldn't say it) and then justin informs me otherwise:)

About the song...the other day i was singing a verse to a popular song on the radio. I was singing "how many times can i pray to my shadow" well, justin informed me that the lyrics actually said "how many times can i break till i shatter" What??

Glinda the Good-Witch said...

That's so funny. I hate to admit this on your blog but I thought the same thing. We get it from mom...remember the turd story?
Sarah

Danalin said...

Tyler and I have looked these things up on the internet many times because we say the same things different ways. I've been right about half of the time. :) Love the pictures of Laura's wedding. What a beautiful bride!

Amy said...

haha.....that is hilarious! I have to admit I have that exact same disorder as well. And before I started reading this post (and so had no idea what I was about to read), when I saw "For all intensive purposes", I started laughing to myself and thought, "Hmm....that's another one. I always thought it was for all intents and purposes." So I"m glad that I at least got that one right! haha....so nice.....

Janelle said...

I always get caught singing the wrong lyrics to songs. Ashley makes fun of me, and thinks it's hilarious what I come up with. Let me say my version of the SpongeBob theme song--way cuter than the original. I think the one that takes the cake for me is when I was younger--Do you remember the song Glory of Love (Peter Cetera, Chicago-I remember those two versions) I would sing, "I am the man who would fight for your arm". It made sense in my head because they ask for your hand in marriage??? The real word is honor, not arm. Felt dumb when I was called out on that one! Thanks for making me laugh about it tonight. I also hear people wrong a lot! Sigh. Maybe you thought it was intensive purposes because of me--only figured that myself about a year ago!
Laura was a gorgeous bride. I LOVE the picture of all the women in your family!
The turd story sounds hysterical--maybe someday I'll get to hear that one! ;)

McLeod Clan said...

Your lack of common sense has always been one of my favorite things about you! It's what makes Ann, Ann and so amazing! I love that Laura looks so classic. How beautiful!

Heather and Billy said...

Maybe you DO have a hearing disorder!
But really, I'm guilty of the same thing with songs. I won't admit to it though.

Ben & Eirene said...

Ah, Annie! I got online to find a recipe for Indian Flat Bread, and instead find myself here, reading your blog! What a happy change of plans. (If it makes you feel better, and speaking of India, I thought that the Ganges River was pronounced Gang-us, and would say "I see which way the Gang-us is flowing," in the hopes that smart people, who knew the river, would think that I, too, was a smarty. It was a bitter descent to reality when my husband figured out what I was saying, and burst my bubble of geographical intelligence. Ah. Humble pie.

Valerie said...

I appreciate your honesty. I can't believe Laura is old enough to be in a wedding dress. Wow, we are old!

Her Royal Highness said...

You had this disorder when we were kids. "What a feelin'" song from Flashdance for example. "Take your pants off. And make it happen." I ALWAYS think of you when I hear that song.
And there's another one that I can't think of right now because I have the Flashdance song in my head now.
But Ann, you crack me up. And you're not the only one with this disorder - I suffer from time to time as well. I just wish I were as funny and witty with words as you are!

Anonymous said...

Ann, this is Dad. For decades, I would hear that Monkees song "Sleepy Jean" and was puzzled to hear the words, "Cheer up Sweet Bejean, oh what can it mean..."

I also had a lawyer at work who wrote in a brief something about "inclimate weather" instead of "inclement weather."

And finally, there's a song that the Lettermen sang that was very popular for many years. It has a line that goes something like "I'm not talkin' 'bout Bolivia" or "I'm not talkin' 'bout believing ya" or I'm not talking 'bout leaving ya" followed by "and I don't wanna change your mind..." I think I'll look that one up right now.