Sunday, April 13, 2008

Nothing To Say

I've wanted to post something new for a while, but guess what? I've had nothing to say. So tonight I've decided to just start typing and see where it takes me...

How was my week? Oh, it was fine. I've got a good life, and I love to be at home. My kids are good kids. I've had a bit of trouble with Jane and Camp fighting lately. Actually, it is more like Camp fighting with Jane. I'm not sure what to do about it. My mom has told me to make sure that I give Camp ways to serve Jane and that he will come to really love her by doing so. I do try to do that, so hopefully it will help.

Brian brought home a bunch of boxes that we had been storing in my parents garage. I started going through them the other night and I experienced so much nostalgia. I was reading all of the letters, cards, and notes I came across and that seemed to take me back in time to when they were written. It was weird because after reading stuff for a couple of hours, I would see myself in the mirror, and it would almost startle me because I would realize anew that I am so much different now. My life is different now. Anyway, I was reminded of how fun Malinda's notes were. She always drew really funny pictures to go along with whatever she was writing--And I was reminded of some of the friendships that I had back then that I will always be grateful for. And I found the senior picture where a bunch of us held up letters at the top of the bleachers that spelled "Mo Mo Mo Mo." I still had a couple of the letters. And I found a few of the dance pictures that Larry had given me. He always gave me his 8x10's. So funny. And I found birthday cards my roommates gave me in college, and I found notes written on napkins that Johnny or Emily would send through to me when I worked in the MTC as a dishwasher. And I found the funniest story that Chels had written about me and a card that she gave me when I was apparently really struggling. And I found a couple letters from Sarah telling me how much she loved me. I still remember the day she gave me one of those letters. I was teaching my lab in the Statistics building, and I was wearing a cute black turtle neck and sailor-type jeans, and I felt like my life was falling apart. And I found papers I wrote. What the heck is a 23 factorial experiment? Man, I sounded smart. I wish I could still do that stuff. And then I found love notes, if you will, between Brian and me, from before we were married and during our early marriage. Priceless. I was thinking about how fun it would be to put together a notebook just of letters between Brian and me. I have a ton of them. Wouldn't that be fun to pass on to our kids?
So what do I do with all of that stuff? How do I decided what to keep and what to chuck? It was hard. I don't feel like I can keep toting four boxes of notes around, and what for? I ended up throwing out a lot of it, but some things I still kept. I guess I feel like a select handful of people really have helped to shape my life and it is the letters, etc. from those people that I will keep for now. Who knows? Maybe I will go through the "keep" pile again in a few years and throw out some more of it. Maybe all that will be left in the end are those letters between Brian and Me. I'll never throw those out. Hmmm...this is starting to sound too much like Tuesdays with Morrie or something kinda sappy like that...Anyway...
What else happened? I had really bad gas all week. The rotten egg kind. It wouldn't leave me alone. And Danin started pulling herself up to standing, and Camp said he wasn't going to die yet because he is a little shy with Jesus. And on Thursday morning I was a bad mom. I woke up late and Camp was late for school--and because I was rushing him too much, we started fighting. I yelled and was too rough with him. I did ask for his forgiveness, though, and then I said my morning prayers. (Too bad I hadn't done that right when I got out of bed) And Jane sang Twinkle Twinkle Little Star really well. And Brian stayed home for the entire Saturday and painted the front door. I love when he is home on Saturdays.

12 comments:

nikki said...

I did a similar clean out over Christmas. I still think there are a lot of things that I could get rid of, but I honestly got rid of most of it. I found a couple of shoeboexes full of notes from high school... funny and ridiculous but what are you going to do with them? They are now in the trash or recycling somewhere going the way of all the earth.

Adventures in Healing said...

I have those boxes still too, but they are just a few shoeboxes at this point. At my mom's funeral I seem to remember there being an 'album' of notes and mementos she had put together from when she and my dad were dating. I'd never seen it before but thought it was great and such a cute glimpse into another side of my parents.
I love that Camp says he's not going to die yet because he's shy with Jesus. Almost wish my kids felt that way.

Lisa said...

I did the same thing before moving to cali. I have boxes of notes too!! It is so hard to know what to keep, for now I kept most of it but it is still in the box in the garage so we'll see how long that lasts. Thanks for the blog smack down - I'm going to post now:)

The White Clan said...

YOU KILL ME!!! Letters aree so fun to look at because what was important ot us them is so trivial, and meaningless now. I mean if you look in the big picture of life, high school was just four years and marrige and kids is SOOOO much longer. Four years is nothin', I mean four years ago I only had one kid and was prego with the second. It was fun though, just hangin out and having no worries, well we had worries but nothing like we have now as mothers, and wives. We are actually responsible for peoples salvation now!!! AAAHHHH!!! SCARY!!!! I had better get better at the whole mother thing, or I am BUSTED!

Rachel McEwen said...

Ann, I just love your blogs! Remember when you were at my house I was telling you how Kobe and Kennedy fight constantly...well, tell me your secrets because it is very hard to deal with and I am at a loss with what to do. I too have all my notes and emails (printed)between Justin and I and I can't wait to let my kids read them!!

Valerie said...

Great blog. I enjoy your pictures below as well. I remember Chuka thought it was wierd when I kept letters from old boyfriends and pictures. Funny I haven't looked at them in like- 9 years! I too thought my kids would enjoy seeing them one day.

Theresa Rodriguez said...

I could read your day to day thoughts all day long. I am so inturiged by your writing abilities and find myself reflecting on my life so much after reading about yours. You are a very motivational person i must say!

Anonymous said...

So, I’m just quietly reading through your blog, trying to mind my own business when I’m startled by something . . . MY NAME. While your candidness is refreshing, your friendship is becoming a liability. I’ll have my attorney contact you as soon as he gets home and our night and weekend minutes start. Met my match, hah!

Jen said...

I heard a good suggestion for all the paper note clutter that you don't really want to throw away but wonder if it's worth keeping. Scan them into the ol computer. They won't last in their paper state anyway, and you could put them onto a cd or something. I don't know how well it would work with lined paper, but it might be worth a try!

Ben and Eirene said...

Shy with Jesus! Oh, that made my day! Ann, I'm so glad you left your sweet little notes on my blog. It reminded me what a sensational cousin you are, and how much of an example you've always been to me. I love having Laura and Audrey local for once. They're such gems. And so hilarious. They're good for my abs, and for my spirit.

Danalin said...

For someone who has nothing to say, you sure said a lot! And I loved reading every word.

I made a book like that for Tyler...one with all of our e-mails back and forth. I LOVE them! It's only been three and a half years, but it's already funny to look back and see how far our relationship has come since then. It's also cool to remember how it felt to fall in love and how easy and right it was. Every now and again we open it and read through the e-mails together. It always brings on a lot of kissing and twitterpated feelings. :)

Lila said...

That is a lot of writing for not having anything to say. You already know my dilemma with that. I finally threw away christmas cards that were 6 years old. Yesterday I threw out a letter from Amber that she wrote me in the 6th grade. Crazy huh?