I'm feeling a bit lonely with this dare. I feel responsible to keep posting the dares, though, to keep myself on track, if for nothing else. This is hard. Each dare seems so simple, but often ends up being quite difficult to realize--at least for me. But like I said. I'm not giving up. Lonely or not, I'm sticking to this. Maybe tomorrow I'll show you my new-to-me eBay shams or my new polka dot rug. Maybe I'll have something interesting to write about. I'm not making any promises though, because I think tomorrow will be a hard day.
Here's today's dare:
Talk with your spouse (I'll refrain from inserting any negative expectations:) about establishing healthy rules of engagement (i.e. how to fight nicely). If your mate is not ready for this, then write out your own personal rules to "fight" by. Resolve to abide by hem when the next disagreement occurs.
Here are some "we" rules the book suggests:
1.) We will never mention divorce
2.) We will not bring up old, unrelated items from the past.
3.) We will never fight in public or in front of our children
4.) We will call a "time out" if conflict escalates to a damaging level
5.) We will never touch one another in a harmful way.
6.) We will never go to bed angry with one another. (The temple worker who sealed Brian and me told us that is is bad advice, and I have come to totally agree--at least for Brian and me. Sometimes the best thing for us to do in order to restore peace and let the little things go is just to go to bed and awake to a new day)
7.) Failure is not an option. Whatever it takes, we will work it out.
And here are some "me" rules the book suggests:
1.) I will listen first before speaking.
2.) I will deal with my own issues up-front.
3.) I will speak gently and keep my voice down.